One of the many, many things Canadians are good at is self-deprecating humour. We are always willing to crack a joke about our fair nation if it will make someone smile, and better yet, if we can throw Americans under the bus at the same time. That’s why so many of the world’s best comedians have come from Canada – Mike Meyers, Jim Carrey, Russell Peters, Seth Rogen, Lorne Michaels, and John Candy, to name just a few.
How do you get a Canadian to apologize? Step on his foot.
What do the Toronto Maple Leaf’s and the Titanic have in common? Both look good until they hit the ice.
Did you hear about the guy with the map of Canada tattooed on his butt? Every time he sits down, Quebec separates.
How many Canadians does it take to change a light bulb? None. They don’t change light bulbs, they accept them the way they are.
How many Torontonians does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. He holds the bulb up to the socket and waits while the world revolves around him.
How many Oilers fans does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just sit around in the dark and talk about how good the light bulb used to be.
Canada Day Quiz
1. Who consumes more mac-and-cheese? England, America, or Canada
2. Canada has a prison for polar bears.
True or False?
3. What was Canada Day called before 1982?
Dominion Day or Happy Canada Day
4. How many times have Canadians won the Stanley Cup?
24, 28, 31, or 19
5. Canada is 151 years old.
True or False?
6. What does Canada mean?
Village, Friendly, Forest, or Country
7. Where did we build our UFO landing pad? Alberta, Manitoba, or Saskatchewan
8. Vancouver Island is home to an annual bathtub race.
True or False?
9. Santa Claus is Canadian.
True or False?
10. How much beer do BC residents drink on Canada Day?
500K litres, 2 pack/person
1.2 MM litres, or 80,703 litres
11. Canada is the 2nd largest country in the world.
True or False?
12. Daylight savings does not occur in Saskatchewan.
True or False?
13. First Canadian Prime Minister?
Laurier, McKenzie-King, or MacDonald
14. 65% of Canadians live in igloos.
True or False?
15. Capital of Canada?
Toronto, Calgary, or Ottawa
16. What did Canadians invent?
Insulin, Poutine, Maple Syrup, or Beer
17. Canadians invented ice cream.
True or False?
